The Truth Revealed

The Truth Revealed

Annette’s personal sharing about The Ageless Wisdom Teachings and the profound and powerful impact this has had on her life. If you’ve ever asked the question “what’s it all about?” you’ll love this . . .

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In awe of each other - Annette and Gabe

In Awe of Each Other

Our Love is timeless and beyond this earthly plane. Read here a simple yet Heavenly testimonial to the love we share.

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Turning our Relationships into a project- a women’s dilemma

In this cutting edge article we talk about an issue that we see cycling around constantly in women’s relationships with others that they often cannot see until it is fully revealed to them. It is a great topic for discussion and one that we all need to go to more depths with!

‘Women are making their relationship with another ‘their project’ and they are abandoning themselves in the process; or is it that the choice to ‘project manage’ someone else is actually to avoid their own process?’ 

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College of Universal Medicine

Living together in harmony, in collaboration and in true appreciation are the cornerstones and foundations to having true relationships – relationships that continually deepen, grow and expand, responding to an energetic pull and a purpose that knows there is more to who we are that is beyond this earthly plane.

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Getting Real in Relationships – Women in Livingness February 2018 Workshop Review

So often it is perceived that women who invest in personal development and are interested in self-growth have a certain look about them that could be considered fluffy, new-agey or spiritual. But here was a room packed with oh-so-normal women, from all walks and age groups of life, who most definitely expressed the epitome of the modern woman. These 130 women had come to hear a couple of relationship counsellors present their take on What is Intimacy.

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On intimacy: a meditation inspired by the Women in Livingness Workshop of February 2018

Description needed here… At the Women in Livingness Workshop with Annette Baker and Gabrielle Caplice, I joined many women who had gathered to discuss why we are afraid of being truly intimate in all our relationships.

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Being Real and True – Women in Livingness February 2018 Workshop Review

Description needed here…

I had the pleasure of attending a Women in Livingness workshop in February 2018 held by women for women. Continuing the theme of ‘Getting Real in Relationships’, it explored the topic of intimacy. So what is a workshop held by women for women on relationships and intimacy like?

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Understanding Relationships and Conflict

All of us deep within have a sense and an innate knowing of the fact that we are love, that we have much love to express, and that our relationships at their very core, if engaged with from this knowing, would be representative of the sharing of this precious love that we are. From this starting point it is reasonable and fair to say that our hearts would and do register any deviation away from the choice to be loving in our relationships as being the commencement of conflict and harm.

We are designed and built to be in relationships and share love with each other, by the very fact that we have a physical body and that there are 7 billion plus of us here, suggests that we would have to try extremely hard and make a deliberate conscious choice and effort to not be in relationship with each other. Sharing our love is top on the list of our greatest joys, so it is disturbing for us all and deeply hurtful that we can misappropriate living this truth and get it so wrong that we end up living in conflict.

If we can start off so innocent and true in our connection to love as we are as a baby, so adored and cherished, so able to just be the love that we are and share this, then how is it that we give in to accepting so much conflict, misery, pain, sadness and separation in our relationships as we grow up?

Looking at the state of our relationships worldwide, it is an understatement to say that we could improve immeasurably on the level of harmony in relation to how we are all living and relating together. If we start with the fact that we all want to be loved, and that within the depth of our hearts is a place that never ceases searching for love, or looking for an avenue or outlet to share that love with others, then we can from this point of truth get to an understanding of how wayward is our trajectory when we are on a path away from love.

Any moment that any other speaks ill, bullies, gets jealous of, dismisses, rejects who we are, abuses our good nature, takes advantage of, manipulates emotionally, is not inclusive, imposes on, and exploits, to name but a few glaringly and not so obvious harms, it causes us maximum and often untold pain; these forms of abuse which all come under the umbrella of conflict are the direct opposite of love. This is something we need to be super clear about identifying, not allowing any justification to creep in and not calling it by any other name; any separation from true and loving expression is conflict and nothing less.

What we live with in our world in terms of conflict in our relationships ranges from the subtle and not so commonly labelled as such, to the extremes such as drug abuse, child pornography, terrorism, religious fanaticism, alcoholism, murder, war, sex trafficking, rape, gender inequality, and so much more. If we only had kindness as our starting point these would already be expressions of horror and oppression way beyond fitting that measure, and so to love, which is our true and natural state, these atrocities in our relationships are the complete antithesis, and yet we have somehow accepted many of these behaviours as being part of our ‘cultures’.

From the moment we become aware of the fact that we can be harmed, that we may not be loved back by those in our intimate relationships whom we rely on for care and nurturing, we begin to not trust and hence ‘guard up’ against being hurt. And so at a very early age when we sense that we are not going to be loved back equally by our carers, our elders, our teachers or our friends, we react and protect ourselves so that we don’t have to feel the staggering hurt of how sad it is to be rejected in love.

We are all walking around to varying degrees in and with this protection, so that we don't have our deepest hurts exposed, and with a level of anxiousness in our bodies that has us on ‘red alert’, not trusting each other. This has emerged as a result of the very fact that we do have awareness and a deep down knowing of the degree of hurt we are inflicting on each other simply by our choices to not be loving. We are all guilty of harming each other by not loving one another equally, or through standing by being complicit with abuse when we observe and allow others to not be loving. This is no judgement, merely a reflection and or revelation of how much we have been harmed by abuse that we will actually choose to hold back from stopping it for fear of becoming the target of it again ourselves.

We have accepted as our lot that it is 'normal' in our relationships to expect that we will fall short of being loving, and so it is then seemingly 'normal' to keep people out and to express a very limited version of love to each other. With this acceptance of mediocrity as our measure we have inadvertently allowed and accepted conflict and abuse to be part of this arrangement of a life whereby we live in a ‘less than who we really are’ state of being; and with only a little more than average observation required, and of course a willingness to see it, we can witness this to be the case in so many people and so many relationships all around us, every day.

If we are not fully committed to and are refraining from being loving, this will be felt as a tension in our bodies, and by virtue of this, as conflict in our relationships. Sadly, most if not many of us have made arrangements or allowances to live with some form of conflict in our relationships, in favour of taking the responsibility that is required to commit to being truly loving and therefore healing ourselves and our relationships of the hurts that get in the way of us realising our loving potential. It is fact that we cannot return to or fully be this true potential whilst we resist being open and true in our relationships, and this requires being prepared to bring resolutions, not solutions, to areas of conflict in our relationships.

It is important here to note that this is by no means a call to perfection with loving, or an idealistic, glamorous, romanticised version of what love is, it is though a solid steady intention that needs to be developed, to constantly work at and address the need and importance of expressing and sharing our love daily. If we all signed up for this project there would be less abuse, more harmlessness, more trust, more support, more joy, more honesty and consequently less conflict and more love felt between us all.

The medicine or antidote to the conflict and struggle that we feel in our relationships is for us all to commit to developing, deepening and expressing the love we have for ourselves more fully and freely. We have to begin with loving and valuing ourselves first before we can share our love with any other, and this is actually our greatest conflict; we don't know how to love ourselves deeply and honour and hold that consistently. This conflict then becomes systemic, a virus that infects us all, whilst we are held at ransom by our own control to not get affected by the rejection we feel everyday, which is simply us rejecting our own love first so as to not feel the immense hurt from others rejecting the love that we are; and around it goes.

People who consistently react and create drama or conflict, those that stubbornly resist love and are more hostile and aggressive, more shut down and withdrawn from human relationships, are really just people who are carrying more unresolved hurt than others. It’s not that they don't want love, they are just terrified of feeling their own hurts, so instead they react and reject love, because whether we realise it or not, receiving true love brings up all of our hurts to feel and be healed. It is when we then resist or reject the healing that is on offer that we make the choice, conscious or not, to instead stay with the tension and conflict.

When we do receive love it brings forth memories in our bodies of the amount of lovelessness we have swallowed, of the distance we have strayed from allowing ourselves to surrender to love, or the unfamiliarity of never having been cared for or nurtured in that way; many people find this traumatic and or that it promotes in them a state of anxiousness, and so resolve to harden against love, rather than deal with the sadness that resides beneath the hurt. The more we allow ourselves to get close and love someone the more opportunities there are available for our unresolved hurts to be healed. We can of course alternatively choose to find and or stay in relationships that are beset with conflict, drama and violence to mask our hurts from actually arising, instead digging ourselves deeper into struggle and pain, and collapsing into the resignation of this being how life is.

Nobody really wants their hurts exposed, and so we have become professionals at amassing and concocting a myriad of behaviours to camouflage and subvert our hurts ever seeing the light of day, and ‘masters’ of knowing how to be distracted by hobbies, driven by stress and stimulation in our work, or numbing ourselves with food, alcohol and prescription drugs, all to take the edge off life and to avoid us ever confronting our inner-hurts and underlying sadness. Not only do we mastermind our own avoidance techniques, we also control others from exposing our vulnerabilities by very calculated yet seemingly unconscious ways. We do this by venting our emotions, getting enraged or frustrated, or behaving in dangerous, intimidating and dominating ways so that others are too frightened to confront us, all means of creating further conflict, yet surreptitiously deviating from dealing with the confrontation of facing the truth that is at hand.

We effectively master never having to deal with the deep issues of rejection, lack of self-worth and self-loathing, all of which, left unresolved, maintains the comfort and apparent security of what we have come to know as the status quo, which is conflict in relationships. Strangely if not oddly, conflict can be perceived as and has become a security in relationships for many, in the sense that it offers the emotional highs and lows in life that shield us from feeling the otherwise emptiness, sadness and exhaustion we would be confronted with without it. This is a very clever ‘front’ to keep our true feelings from arising so as to not have to feel our own self-fury at having not loved ourselves, and the deep sadness of others loving us less than the naturally beautiful beings we know we are. We have become so scared of being vulnerable and having someone walk away from loving us, that we choose instead to punish ourselves, and others, resulting in us accepting to live with levels of conflict in our days and in our relationships, that if we were to bring honesty to we would find totally unacceptable.

We can easily note and observe in ourselves and others that our bodies naturally become an environment of conflict when we tense up and harden, and this is for us to bring a deeper understanding to in respect of the why’s and how’s that this occurs. We need to witness and observe with greater understanding what is going on for those of us who express in ways that are complicated, difficult and unpleasant, and to fully realise and accept that the outer-conflict displayed is just a mirror of the inner-conflict, and that beneath that hardened exterior lives a tender essence that we all share.

When we meet people with that same tender essence in us, this gradually and by reflection, works at breaking down that toughness and ‘dedication’ to conflict in others. To resolve conflict in our relationships it is a must that we appeal to the highest point of love in ourselves, and each other, and this is largely if not firstly achieved by making a priority this commitment to ourselves.

It forever remains the responsibility of each of us to take the utmost care of our body, this first environment we live in, if it is in-truth to be a vehicle that expresses love not harm, no other is responsible for, nor can make this choice for us. This is the commitment and dedication that is required if we are to reduce and perhaps one day eliminate conflict in our relationships.

Making love our fortress with the support of Serge Benhayon

Making love our fortress with the support of Serge Benhayon

The three of us meeting was a meeting from the heart instantaneously. Serge Benhayon was there at the start of our relationship, and he was the first person to foresee the importance of our union as a couple. Serge knows each of us so uniquely that he always delivers the exact and particular words needed in a moment, words that instigate and inspire a movement towards our greater potential; with all the words he has shared with us this is exactly what we have done.

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Love the love you share

Love the love you share

Every single day we have the opportunity to grow our relationships, by simply being conscious of expressing the extent of love we feel with our partner or lover on a regular basis.

This simple yet direct article looks at the fascination with following a ‘certain’ day to express this love, rather than offering the commitment of our expression of love in any moment, any day, and living the benefits of true growth that comes from this way of being in relationship.

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